I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
What a dumb baby whore.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
