...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
