Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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