My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
