hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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