yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
