They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
