STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
