I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize