Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
40s are totally the cure
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
