We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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