Me. At least after what I've been through.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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