i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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