After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize