So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize