that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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