i just google imaged poop.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
