is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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