billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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