haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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