roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
