? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
