Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
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