: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
