apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
