My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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