don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
