How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Ketchup is God's man juice
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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