btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
You don't make any sense
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