you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
