so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
