I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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