everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
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