Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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