i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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