He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
