The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
