So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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