ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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