These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...