he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
