About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
