I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
