I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.