how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Randomize
