Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm just crazy horny about you
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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