I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
