There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
