That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize