i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize