My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Is this like a preordered booty call?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
