It's like a parade of train wrecks.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
